Category: writing

Okay, so a friend of mine self-published her first in a series of YA novels. And I’ve been trying hard to write a glowing review, but that ain’t gonna happen.

I’m not going to mention her name or the title of this “greatest series of all time” to save her some pain.

The problem is simple. She’s not a person who takes advice from others. Well, that and she’s cheap. Therefore she didn’t hire an editor of any kind… Come-on girl, even Stephan King uses editors.

The cover of this “Harry Potter kind of series” should have a big red “watch for falling cliches” label on the cover.

It has a pirate queen. She’s from Ireland. Her long time bestie is from Scotland – handsome and charming of course.

Que unrequited love.

Then there’s that bit about this pirate being someone special, but not knowing anything about her parents. -Shades of “Star Wars.” I know they weren’t the first, but they made the most money doing it.

This is followed by seven magic orbs that the bad guy already knows about. -If the bad guys are so damn smart, why do they always lose?

STOP YAWNING! Now pay attention.

It’s self-published at a press I’ve never heard of and can’t find any mention of in Google. It had proofreaders, but no actual editor(s). Except for correction of a couple of misspelling and a bad line break this is a first draft.

Next, it’s a large print trade paperback (8 1/2 by 5 1/2), with maybe a couple of hundred words on a page, with a total of 275 pages, selling for $14.99 on Amazon.

If she wasn’t someone I’d known for twenty plus years I’d never have paid that much for a skinny trade-paperback.

I can sum my review of this mess with the last line, “‘Impending war.!’ She uttered.” Okay, so it’s a young adult novel, right? Well, just ask any YA and you’ll find they’ve never used the word “impending” in their lives. A simple “War!” would have been more effective. ‘Cus everyone knows that the last phrase predicts the future. So you don’t have to beat us over the head with it.

On top of that, it has to be the flattest last line I’ve ever read. Where’s the tension? Where’s the buildup to the next book? And why in the name of all that’s holy did she use the word “uttered?” Breathed, whispered, screamed, or any of a thousand other words that convey emotion would have been preferable.

But, having said all that. The absolutely most egregious offense is the cover art. The cover art creates our first impression of a book, especially a fantasy/ adventure novel, and I wouldn’t put something that bad on the cover of a child’s book.

I’m still trying to get through this thing and I got as far as page 9 when this description caught my attention.

“She stood almost six feet tall, muscularly feminine build with a mental presence harmonious with her appearance.”

“Harmonious with her appearance.” In a YA novel???

Mary, mother of God. Oh, nevermind. I’ll get through it… Someday, maybe.

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Okay. Now on to real life. If you’re going to go through all the fuss and bother to write a your first novel, you need an editor or series of editors, especially if you’re going to self-publish. Because what your mind sees as you write is rarely what other people see as they read. (A mainstream publisher will provide the necessary editors)

There are development editors that look at your overall manuscript, meaning, characterizations, vocabulary, structure, and style. For your first book this is the guy you want.

Copy editors fine tune your copy. They check for consistency, grammar, fact check, anomalies, and the like.

And then there are proofreaders. They check for missing punctuation, grammatical errors, and even formatting.

Here’s a price list for independent editors on the Editorial Freelancers Association site.

And here’s a bunch of useful information on getting published by Blake Atwood over on The Write Life.

I found Reedsy, an independent publisher, via Barnes and Noble, and they offer a number of useful services. None of them are free, but you get what you pay for.

I’ve been writing, editing, and proofreading my own copy and the only sign of improvement is that I now get rejection letters instead of being ignored.

At the end of the day only you can decide if you’re willing to pay or not. But while I think hiring an editor(s) is a good idea, there’s no guarantee they’ll get you published by a mainstream publisher. And while there’s no guarantee you’ll ever sell anything, no matter how well edited, if you self-publish. But I can pretty well guarantee that if you don’t get somebody to edit your copy, you’ll have a problem child on your hands.

I’m sure there’s someone out there who’s getting along just fine without ever having anyone else read and critique their work, but I’ve never met them.

And for God’s sake get some decent artwork.

I’ve pretty much decided that Scrivener 3 for windows is dead in the water so I’m off to find an alternative. Preferably an alternative that doesn’t have the learning curve that Scrivener has.

Mostly I write with whatever word processor I feel like using. But I also keep notebooks, file cards, and loose sheets of paper with character references and world descriptions. As a result, no matter how often I clean it, my office looks like I’ve never touched it.

My current filing system is stacks of papers and folders so I have to work to remember where I put one of my references. While it’s a great excuse to take a break, it also breaks my concentration. Which makes it a bitch to keep focused.

So, I’m off to find something to keep me organized.

yWriter is a free (you can register it for a fee that’s mostly to keep the author in business), one man operation, with only windows support. What yWriter does differently from other writing software is that it breaks up your great American novel into scenes instead of chapters. This gives you smaller chunks so work with but it doesn’t work well with my mind set.

So I next tried Final Draft, which is the screen writing software used by a bunch of pros. But it doesn’t lend itself to novel writing. besides, Final Draft 11 is $200 on sale. – Ask any aspiring author, that’s a lot of money if you don’t have a market to sell your book/script.

iA Writer is essentially a markdown platform, but it does give you a distraction free environment. What I found interesting is that it was difficult to find the actual sales page. – $29.99 plus tax for windows. Unfortunately I need more organization than it gives me.

Hey. Scrivener 3 is out. Yippy, dippy, hip-hip, hurray. I’m off to download it. With my discount it was $24.99 instead of $49. This is what they say about discounts:

Upgrade Pricing

The update to Scrivener 3 is free for users who bought Scrivener 1 on or after 20th November 2017. Users who purchased Scrivener 1 for Windows before that can buy Scrivener 3 with a 49% discount. The upgrade fee is the same for both the regular and education licences. Only users who purchased from our store, or from a reseller that provides activation through our store, are eligible for discounted update pricing.

Obviously, they don’t care about early adopters or spell checkers. – it’s “licenses” not “licences.”

If you’re wondering about these latest posts. Or any of my randomness, what can I say? I’m bored outta my fuckin’ skull… Does it show?

I am an aspiring author giving advice… And the truth be told, I’ve gotten so many rejection letters that I’ve quit saving them. Hell, I even got one from a friend who publishes anthologies. -At least that one wasn’t a form letter. But the advice I’m giving is still valid.

The rules are simple: Butt goes on chair. Words go on paper. The chair is optional.

Your first draft will suck, so what. Write it, then fix it, so you can really fix the next time, or maybe the time after that, etc.

Remember, you’ll never be Hemingway, Tolkien, Steinbeck or King. Those jobs are taken. But they are great teachers.

Make notes. I don’t care if you’re a planner or a pantser. Write down your ideas, or you will, like as not, forget them.

And make detailed notes about your characters. After all, you don’t want your sidekick suddenly morphing into the anti-hero. Or the hero changing his/her height, weight, hair, bank balance, or language.

Take classes -a lot of them are free, or join a forum, where your fellow would be writers will cheerfully rip your best work to shreds. But then they’ll tell you why. That random publisher may not even bother to read it.

On that subject, somebody in that publisher’s office has the job of rejecting your manuscript, and your job is to convince them not to.

On the subject of forums; avoid those happy, happy, joy, joy places where everybody is kind, sweet, and supportive. They may be good for your ego, but you’ll never learn anything.

And be prepared for assholes. They just can’t help themselves. They rarely teach you anything, but they do help your ego develop callouses.

Writing flash fiction will help you learn how to eliminate unnecessary words and get to the point.

Writing short stories will help you find your voice without a fifty thousand word investment.

If you can, take the 50,000 word / 30 day NaNoWriMo challenge. It’s a bitch, but you learn a lot and have a chance to meet some interesting people.

The list of possible advice is endless and, at the end of the day, repetitive. But here’s the last bit for this post… READ! Read everything and reread the stuff you like. And WRITE! Often. If you don’t have a lot of time, write short stories, flash fiction, kids books, or blog posts. But write.

Writing is tough, with lots of competition.

Remember, all these people faced the same competition and eventually got published anyway. So, write.

As a side, and final note, there are lots of free images our there for things like blog posts. These photos are from Free Images dot com, one of my favorite sources for free, royalty free, images.