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  • Rich 12:36 pm on February 11, 2016 Permalink | Reply  

    Meat Loaf Condom 

    When I was sorting all the junk I’ve accumulated over the years I found this in an old guitar case. It’s a Meat Loaf condom….. No. Not a condom made of ground meat. –It’s a real rubber.

    It’s a souvenir condom from 1993, advertising Bat Out of Hell II: Back into Hell, by the singer named Meat Loaf.
    meat loaf condom
    back of meat loaf condom

    I got it when Meat Loaf’s “Everything Louder Tour” came to the Aladdin Theater here in Vegas, back in ’94.
    –That was so fuckin’ many years ago that I had to look it up.

    The cool part of this package is that it’s still unopened after all these years. The not so cool part is that I bought it to use with a cute chick, who went back to her boyfriend the same night. Which is why it’s still unopened. :-(

    • Rich 12:48 pm on February 6, 2016 Permalink | Reply  

      Vlogging — Fail 

      A dude I know got all exited when he was asked to do a company vlog (Video Blog). So he ran out and bought a bunch of equipment, like recorders, mixers, lighting and green screens. –Before seeing the money.

      Yeah, you saw this next bit coming:
      After he put all that shit junk and crap on his card he was told that the company didn’t have the budget to reimburse him after all.

      Can you say crash and burn? –So much for his shot at internet fame.

      The good part is he bought it all with a 30 day, no questions asked, right of return. So he dragged everything back to the store except for this Sony recorder he bought online.

      Sony Recorder
      Instead of returning it or using it for work he sold it to me.

      It was one of those, “I’ve gotta have it” moments, because the second I saw it, I had an epiphany. –I would use it to record all those brilliant ideas I have while I’m rolling in to work.

      Yeah, right. “Best laid schemes” and all that.

      I’ve tested it and it has pretty good noise rejection, so it’ll do the job, but I haven’t had a flash of brilliance worth recording since I bought it.

      Oh well, I’ll find something to do with it, but something tells me it’s not going to make any sort of major change in the way I work. :-(

      Note to self:
      Next time ignore the stupid epiphany and spent the money on dope or booze. They won’t make you a genius, but for a little while they’ll let you delude yourself into believing you are.

      • Rich 11:51 am on February 4, 2016 Permalink | Reply  

        How to be a Morning Person 

        I read something –I’ll be damned if I can remember where– about how to become a morning person, so I gave it a try. –Mary mother of God, it sucks!

        Alright then, just in case one of you night owls wants to see how much pain you can endure here are the basics:

        Get out of bed and start moving. Don’t hit snooze, just put your feet on the floor and go.

        Turn on the lights. Light helps the mind realize it’s daytime. –It seems that most of the rest of you are programmed to wake when it’s light and sleep when it’s dark.

        If you have something to do for the first fifteen or twenty minutes you’re over the hump. Cook breakfast, make coffee or something like that.

        I don’t suggest taking a shower first thing unless it’s very cool. –I don’t know about you, but a hot shower pounding on my back or better yet the back of my head feels so good that it leaves me fighting to stay awake.

        You’ll also need to get enough sleep. So train yourself to go to bed early. No late night computer, TV or texting. And no caffeine; which means no coffee, coke, chocolate or dark tea.

        And there you have it. The basics of how to become a morning person.

        I knew morning people were weird, I just didn’t realize how weird, until I tried to be like them.

        Eat right, exercise, get enough sleep. == Die anyway.

        • Rich 2:25 pm on January 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply  

          Addendum to Domain BS 

          Just a fast update.
          “Darkdreams dot com” seems to have been hijacked. It redirects to a site that has a voice telling you over and over that you have a virus. –It didn’t appear to be trying to install malware, but bitdefender may have blocked it. Anyway, lots of luck closing your browser after going there.

          And “asleep dot com” is for sale for $112,500.00. –Makes the other domains look cheap doesn’t it.

          • Rich 11:23 am on January 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply  

            More Domain Bullshit 

            I was looking for new domain names for the company and found a couple that sounded good. Unfortunately, somebody already snatched up the name I really wanted. The good news is that it’s for sale; for a mere $28,800 and the other was a steal at only $21k. You know, they say domain squatting was illegal, but they said nothing about buying domains for resale.

            And the domain registrars aren’t any better. They sell “premium domain names” for a considerable profit. For instance, one domain I considered has a one time charge of $1499 in addition to the usual yearly fee.

            They all do it and they’re the only game in town, so what can you do?

            Moving on:
            Another aggravation is a friend who owns “Political Nevada dot com.” It was supposed to be exactly what it sounds like, a political blog. Then he decided he might offend the wrong people, like certain politicians who are also friends. So it sits empty.

            So fucking what! It’s supposed to offend somebody. The whole point of a political blog is to support certain politicians, while shining the cold hard light of day on their opponents backroom dealings. And who better to do it than someone who’s a friend and campaign contributor?

            Barring that, how about just tweaking their noses by posting their personal foibles. That’s not only fun, it’ll probably make for a large following. With the bonus of it being very unlikely to seriously affect anyone’s political careers, so as long as it’s done for fun political friends shouldn’t be too unhappy.

            Ah, well, there’s no chance he’ll ever sell it, he doesn’t need the money. And there’s no chance in Hell he’ll ever use it.

            On top of that, the few things he wrote way back when were so poorly edited that they read more like stream of consciousness than well thought out prose.

            His excuse was that he “didn’t have time.” So how about putting everything in a draft and letting someone else edit the final version? –Nope, it was “his article.”

            And before you ask; he won’t tell me anything he knows about the local politicos because he knows damn well I’d publish it in a heartbeat. –It really sucks to have a well connected source you can’t use.

            It’s no wonder my brain hurts.

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